How to Write Romance That Feels Real, Not Cliché
Romance is one of the most beloved genres in fiction, but it’s also one of the trickiest to get right. If you’ve spent any time on #BookTok or visiting any number of the dedicated romance stories taking root in many cities, readers want to be swept off their feet. As in life, not every moment will sweep us off our feet and readers crave authenticity—relationships that mirror the complexity of real life. So how do you craft a love story that feels fresh and genuine without falling into the trap of clichés? Here’s how to write romance that lingers in your readers’ hearts.
Develop Relatable Characters
Real romance begins with robust and relatable characters. If your characters feel flat or one-dimensional, their romantic relationship will come across as shallow or forced. Instead of focusing solely on their looks or romantic roles, give them fully fleshed-out personalities, goals, and flaws that make them feel like real individuals. A character’s past experiences, values, and emotional wounds should influence how they approach love.
Why this works: Readers connect with characters who feel like real people because their struggles and triumphs mirror their own. For example, a character who has been hurt before might have trouble trusting their partner, creating opportunities for growth and tension.
Avoid Insta-Love
While physical attraction is often immediate, true love takes time to develop. Relationships that are rushed or based solely on instant chemistry feel unrealistic or unearned. Instead, allow your characters to gradually discover each other’s strengths, weaknesses, and quirks over time. Let them face challenges together, share quiet moments, and build a foundation of trust.
Why this works: A slow-burn romance gives readers time to invest in the relationship and feel the emotional payoff when the characters finally come together. By letting the connection evolve naturally, the romance feels grounded and believable.
Show, Don’t Tell
One of the most common mistakes in writing romance is over-explaining the characters’ feelings. Instead of explicitly stating that two people are in love, show their connection through their actions, dialogue, and body language. For instance, rather than writing “She couldn’t live without him,” describe how she supports him in his darkest moments or the way her heart pounds when he isn’t in the room.
Why this works: Actions speak louder than words, especially in romance. When readers can see love through a character’s choices and behaviors, it resonates on a deeper emotional level. For more on how to show, not tell, read this blog post.
Embrace Imperfections
Perfect characters and perfect relationships are boring because they don’t reflect reality. Real love is messy—it involves misunderstandings, personal baggage, and opportunities for growth. Don’t shy away from showing your characters’ flaws or the challenges they face in their relationship. Maybe one character struggles with vulnerability, or the other has trouble balancing their career and love life. These imperfections make the story relatable and the resolution more satisfying.
Why this works: Conflict is the heart of any great story, and romance is no different. By showing how your characters work through their flaws and challenges, you create a narrative that feels authentic and rewarding.
Create Unique Chemistry
Every romantic relationship is different, and your characters’ connection should reflect that. Chemistry is built over time. Think about what draws the characters to each other and what sets their bond apart. Do they share a quirky sense of humor? Do they challenge each other to grow in ways no one else can? How to they attune to each other’s needs? The more specific and personal their chemistry, the more compelling their romance will feel.
Why this works: Generic romances feel forgettable, but when your characters’ connection is based on specific, meaningful traits, it creates a relationship readers can’t help but root for.
Avoid Overused Tropes—Or Subvert Them
Romance is filled with tropes like love triangles, enemies-to-lovers, or forbidden love. While these tropes are popular for a reason, relying on them without adding your own twist can make your story feel predictable. Instead, think about how you can reimagine these ideas to surprise readers. For example, in an enemies-to-lovers story, maybe the characters start out disliking each other not because of a misunderstanding but because one of them represents a threat to the other’s career or family.
Why this works: Subverting expectations keeps readers engaged while still delivering the emotional payoff they crave. AKA, do what is right for your story but don’t make it fully predictable.
Anchor the Story in Emotion
Romance is one of our most powerful emotions—use it! Lean into the feelings your characters experience. Think about what’s at stake emotionally for each character and how their relationship changes them. Are they scared to open up? Do they feel unworthy of love? These emotional undercurrents should drive the story, making every interaction between the characters feel meaningful.
Why this works: Readers are drawn to romance because it evokes powerful emotions. By focusing on what your characters are feeling and why, you create a connection that feels deeply personal and real.
Endings That Feel Earned
A satisfying romantic ending doesn’t have to be a fairy tale, but it does need to feel earned. Whether your story ends with a happily-ever-after, a hopeful new beginning, or even a bittersweet goodbye, the resolution should reflect the journey your characters have been on. Avoid tying everything up too neatly—readers appreciate a touch of realism that acknowledges the challenges of love.
Why this works: An earned ending feels satisfying because it’s rooted in the story’s emotional arc. Readers want to see that the characters have grown and fought for their happiness, making the resolution all the more rewarding.
Writing romance that feels real and not cliché is about capturing the depth, complexity, and beauty of human connection. By focusing on your characters’ individuality, emotional growth, and authentic interactions, you can create a love story that resonates with readers long after they’ve turned the last page.
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